Boys vs Girls
by isawyouasaperson
Summary: All human High school AU where the boys piss of the girls who then declare war. Belvafore.
**AN: Basically there was too much angst (both on the show and in my other fics) and I wanted to do something on the lighter side. This is partially based off of Phyllis Reynolds Naylor's children's series. Standard disclaimer for both the books and TVD applies.**

Bonnie paused at the top of the hill, catching her breath as the first rays of sun peaked over the horizon. This was always her favorite time of day, as the sun came up and she could watch her sleepy little town come alive.

She glanced back down the hill towards her house. There was a moving van in front of the next door neighbors, the only other house nearby, and even then it was still a couple hundred yards away across a wide dead-end road. She hadn't noticed the van when she left for her run twenty minutes ago, but it had been pretty dark and she had been in a hurry. People living next door again would be weird. No one had lived there since the Parkers, and that had been almost five years ago. Apparently, houses where a boy had tried to kill his family weren't easy to sell.

Her watch beeped, reminding her that she had to get back home in time to shower and eat before Caroline picked her up for their first day of junior year. Bonnie took off back down the hill, grinning at the sense of freedom that always came with running. Once she got back, she did her stretches in the front yard before going in, knowing that her Grams would rush her straight to the shower before she had a proper cool down.

When she finished stretching, she glanced across the street just in time to see a guy with dark hair wearing a black wife beater and black jeans carrying a box into the house. She couldn't help but admire his broad shoulders, narrow hips, and perfect ass. Hopefully he was part of the family moving in and not a moving guy. That would be disappointing.

When she got inside Grams hustled her off to the shower, telling her that breakfast would be ready by the time she got out.

"Pancakes?" She asked hopefully.

"Before a long day at school? Hell no. You're getting a veggie omelet and fruit smoothie. Now git." Grams ordered, earning a sigh from Bonnie.

"You know, most runners appreciate a healthy breakfast after their run." Grams commented.

"Most runner's grandmothers don't make the world's best pancakes." Bonnie cajoled.

Her Grams stared at her for a second. "Fine." She sighed. "But you're topping it with peanut butter and bananas. I can't have you running out of energy twenty minutes into your first day." She called as Bonnie darted up the stairs grinning.

"Thanks Grams." She called.

She came back down stairs thirty minutes later, setting her backpack at the front door before going back into the kitchen to find Caroline sitting at the table devouring pancakes.

"Hey Bon." Care called over a mouth full of food. "Oh good. You're wearing the outfit I picked out. I was afraid I'd have to make you change."

Bonnie rolled her eyes as she loaded up her plate with hot pancakes topped with peanut butter and bananas, as promised. The only reason she'd agreed to wear Caroline's ridiculously short dress was her fear of Caroline lecturing her about looking their best on their first day. She'd gotten that lecture every year since middle school, and it was getting old. So instead of her usual t-shirt and shorts, Bonnie was wearing a dark purple sun dress with a v-neckline, to highlight her breasts, Caroline explained, and a jean jacket with brown leather gladiator sandals. The outfit was practical enough that Bonnie could go through the day without worrying about flashing anyone, but still showed off more skin than she was used too. Caroline, meanwhile, wore a baby blue summer dress with a pale cream cardigan and dark green flats, the perfect combination of girly and innocent. Both girls hair was curled, though Bonnie's was pulled up into a ponytail except for her bangs, while Caroline's was left down.

"Don't you roll your eyes at me. We are going to be the hottest girls at school, mark my words." Caroline declared, taking a sip of her green tea. Over the summer, she'd gotten it into her head that drinking green tea instead of coffee helped relax her, though Bonnie couldn't really see a difference.

"I don't see what you wanting to look hot has to do with me." Bonnie muttered, taking a sip of her coffee. There's no way she was giving that up, regardless of Care's green tea relaxation technique.

"I can't abandon you too mediocrity. Now, hurry up and eat. I don't want to be late."

Bonnie quickly scarfed down her breakfast, gulping down the last of her coffee and yelling bye to her Grams before rushing out the door and climbing into Care's old Accord.

"So who's moving in?" Caroline asked as soon as they were on the road.

"I don't know. I didn't even realize anyone was moving in until this morning."

"Can you at least tell me if there's any hot guys?"

"There was one, but he might have been part of the moving crew. And I didn't see his face, so he might just be ugly with a great body." Bonnie explained.

"That doesn't matter. There are positions where you don't even have to see his face." Caroline declared gaily.

Bonnie blushed and rolled her eyes. Despite both of them having sex before, she still wasn't used to the way Caroline talked about it so freely.

Caroline soon switched the subject to which teachers and classes they'd have together, a subject that they'd already run into the ground, but since it was the first day it seemed brand new.

They pulled into the small parking lot close to the entrance. Once this lot filled, the only other lot was over twice as far from the school. Luckily, there was one spot left. Just as Caroline was about to pull in, a little red sports car darted into the spot, stealing it.

"HEY!" Caroline shouted, leaning on the horn.

Two guys climbed out of the car, one with dark hair out of the passenger side and one with light brown hair out of the driver's seat. Both were drop dead gorgeous, with tight t-shirts that outlined all of their muscles perfectly. The guy with light hair was wearing a white shirt over dark wash jeans while the guy with dark hair wore black jeans and a black t-shirt.

 _He's going to be sweating by the end of the day._ Was Bonnie's last thought before his eyes met hers. She'd never seen anything quite that shade of blue before, and thanks to his pale skin and monochromatic wardrobe, they seemed to pop out of his face. She got lost in them for a second before she heard Caroline opening her door and jumping out of the car. Bonnie turned to watch her, already cringing at what she knew would be a nasty confrontation.

"Hey, Assholes! That's my spot!" Caroline yelled at the guys, storming up to them.

"Well next time try parking in it." The dark haired guy remarked, brushing past Caroline.

"I was about to when you two zipped in!" Caroline growled.

"Not our problem." He called back, not even bothering to turn around.

Caroline growled in frustration before turning to the other guy. "Move your damn car." She ordered.

"Look, I'm sorry for taking your spot and on any other day I would move, but – " The guy started before he was interrupted.

"Stefan, let's go." The dark haired guy yelled.

"I'm so sorry, but I have to go." Stefan told Caroline before jogging after his friend.

"Hey! Hey!" Caroline shouted after them.

"Care, they're not coming back. Let's just move to the other lot." Bonnie suggested.

"Fine. But this means war." Caroline declared, climbing back into the car.

"Caroline, it's a parking space. Don't you think you're blowing this out of proportion?" Bonnie asked, hoping against hope that Caroline would drop it. Of course, she had no such luck.

"No, I am not blowing it out of proportion, Bonnie Bennett!" Caroline ranted. "They took the last good spot on the first day of school! Today was supposed to be perfect and they threw off our groove!"

Bonnie sighed, climbing out of the newly parked car and heading towards the school. Caroline was in a mood and there was no point arguing with her. "Look, I'm going to go get my books from my locker. You go get that last book you need from Nora and meet me at home room." She instructed.

"Fine, but this isn't over. We are taking those two down." Caroline reiterated before marching off towards the library.

Bonnie rolled her eyes before moving towards her locker. She was just dialing in her combination when someone came up beside her. She glanced at him and was surprised to find the dark haired guy from earlier. Unfortunately, he happened to glance at her at the exact same time, and their eyes met. Bonnie quickly looked away, hoping he would ignore her.

"Hey, you were with that chick earlier, the crazy blonde one." The guy commented. "What is her problem?"

"Well, you did take her spot." Bonnie pointed out, a little offended on Caroline's behalf, regardless of whether or not the "crazy" comment might have been deserved.

"We didn't take anything. She wasn't in the spot and it certainly didn't have her name on it." The guy shrugged coolly.

"Yeah, but she was obviously about to take it when your friend came roaring in out of nowhere and blocked her." Bonnie argued before realizing what she was arguing about. "You know what, it doesn't matter. It's just a parking spot." She shut her locker and started walking away when his voice stopped her.

"Wow, great ass. I knew I knew you from somewhere. You're that chick across the street from us." He said.

Bonnie froze before spinning back to face him, struggling to keep her cool. "Did you just recognize me by my ass?" She asked, anger and warning coating her tone.

"What can I say, it's pretty memorable, especially in the pictures I have in my mind with those stretches." He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows.

"You watched me stretch, you creep?" Bonnie whisper shrieked, not wanting anyone around them to overhear.

"Relax. It won't happen again. Not now that I know you have a stick up your ass, Judgey. I'm definitely not interested in sleeping with a prude." He smirked.

"Like I'd ever sleep with a guy who needs to steal parking spaces to prove his manhood." Bonnie retorted.

"Oh trust me, sweetheart, I don't need to prove anything." He murmured, stepping into her space and forcing her to tilt her chin back to look at him. There was no way she was stepping back and letting this jerk think he'd intimidated her.

"Can you say overcompensation?" Bonnie asked.

"No, but I can say Judgey little thing who needs to go back to playing with the kiddies." He said, brushing past her before she could retort.

Bonnie nearly threw her book at the back of his retreating head before growling under her breath. If she threw it, she'd have to go get it and possibly talk to him again. Not something she wanted to do. Instead, she marched off towards home room.

"I'm in." She told Caroline, plopping down beside her.

"You're in?" Caroline asked.

"I'm in. Let's take these assholes down."

 **BDSC**

A cold splash of water on his face rudely yanked Stefan from his sleep. Spluttering, he sat up and glared at his older brother, struggling to keep himself from attacking him.

"What the hell?" He shouted.

"You wouldn't wake up." Damon said.

"How hard did you try?" Stefan yelled. He knew he was a deep sleeper, but that seemed over the top.

"Pretty hard. I said your name at least twice."

"Damon!"

Damon sighed. "Kidding. Now can we go unload before dad notices we're not helping?"

"Fine." Stefan grumbled. It was way too early for this.

They were on their fourth trip out when Damon paused.

"Damn." Damon hummed with a wolfish grin.

"What now?" Stefan snapped.

"Check her out." Damon pointed across the street to where a young girl was touching her toes to stretch her calves. She was wearing short running shorts and a sports bra. From what Stefan could see in the early morning, she had a great body.

"Please don't sleep with our neighbor. I don't want anyone hating us quite yet." He begged, well aware of what was going through his brother's mind.

"She wouldn't hate you." Damon pointed out, eyes still on the girl.

"Just leave her alone." Stefan sighed as he grabbed a box and started walking back inside. Damon came inside a minute later with the last of the boxes.

"Good, you boys finished up. Come eat before school." Their mother Lily said, dragging both of them into the kitchen.

"Please tell me we have something without kale." Damon begged under his breath, but Lily still heard him.

"Damon Salvatore, is that any way to thank your mother who slaved away in the kitchen to fix you a wholesome breakfast?" Lily snapped before handing them both bran bars and tall glasses of green smoothies.

"Wholesome or poisonous?" Damon asked sarcastically.

"Looks good, mom." Stefan jumped in before Lily had a chance to be offended.

"Thank you, Stefan. Now, you both have a meeting with admissions at 7:30. Here's all your transcripts and paperwork." Lily handed Stefan both boy's papers. "You both have lunch money, and they'll have everything else for you."

"Mom, we know how the first day of school works." Damon sighed.

"Damon, respect your mother. How many times do I have to tell you that?" Their father, Giuseppe, asked, coming into the kitchen for the first time that morning. "Since you were rude to your mother, Stefan gets to drive you both to school in his car."

"Whatever." Damon shrugged.

"Speaking of which, we have to go if we want to make it in time for our meeting." Stefan said, grabbing his backpack and checking to make sure their paperwork was still in it.

"Yes, yes, of course. Have a good first day." Lily encouraged, pushing them out the door.

"Stefan, keep your brother out of trouble." Giuseppe ordered.

"Sure, Dad." Stefan called over his shoulder with a grin as he slipped behind the wheel.

"Swing by Starbucks on the way. I need coffee." Damon directed.

Stefan glanced at his watch. "Damon, we don't have time."

"Come on, Stef. We can be a few minutes late. You know I'll be asleep half way through second period if we don't." Damon wheedled.

"Damon, we're not going to be late to our first day." Stefan argued.

"Stefan, I just need a damn cup of coffee." Damon pled.

"No." Stefan stated.

"Fine. Mom's health obsession and your punctuality are going to kill me." Damon grumbled.

"Yes, mom trying to be healthy is going to kill you." Stefan said drily, smirking at Damon.

"Thank you." Damon said, gesturing emphatically.

Stefan sighed and shook his head. "I'll go to Starbucks as long as you take the rap if we're late." He offered.

"Do you even have to ask?" Damon smirked.

Stefan chuckled before pulling into the drive through.

The coffee took much longer than they expected, and Stefan rushed towards the school. It was already 7:35 when he pulled into the front lot. There was one spot left and Stefan honed in on it, rushing into the parking spot. He quickly shut off the engine, grabbed his bag and climbed out of the car.

A horn echoed through the parking lot, coming from a car right behind his. A second later, a gorgeous blonde stepped out of the car. She was tall, with perfect proportions that her dress highlighted perfectly, putting her long legs on display. But it was her eyes that captured his attention. They looked like the sky right before a hurricane, grey blue and furious. Stefan couldn't remember the last time he'd seen anyone that angry.

"Hey! Assholes! That's my spot!" She shouted, storming up to them.

"Well next time try parking in it." Damon commented, brushing past her.

"Shit." Stefan muttered under his breath. Damon was already making enemies. This was a record, even for him.

"I was about to when you two zipped in." The blonde declared furiously. Stefan had no doubt that he and Damon were going to regret this for quite some time if she had anything to say about it.

"Not our problem." Damon yelled over his shoulder, already half way to the entrance.

"Move. Your. Damn. Car." The blonde ordered, turning on Stefan.

"Look, I'm sorry for taking your spot and on any other day I would move, but –" Stefan started to explain before Damon interrupted him.

"Stefan, let's go."

Stefan glanced at Damon and saw him already almost in the building.

"I'm so sorry, but I have to go." Stefan told her as he took off after Damon. There was no way he was making a bad impression on his first day.

"I can't believe you made us so late I had to take that girl's spot." Stefan muttered, catching up with Damon.

"Would you relax? We were there first. I'm sure she'll be fine."

"All I wanted to do today was not make any enemies. Figured we could leave that until tomorrow, and yet, somehow someone already hates my guts." Stefan bemoaned.

"You'll survive. If it gets too bad, just do what I do." Damon suggested.

"I'm not seducing her. Besides, that's never helped you. Everyone you've ever slept with hates your guts, so you'll have to forgive me for not taking your advice." Stefan said with and eye roll.

"True, but you get laid, and trust me, hate sex is the best." Damon grinned, wiggling his eyebrows.

"I'm just glad you don't want to sleep with her." Stefan muttered.

"I said hate sex, not will-try-to-murder-me sex." Damon explained.

"So you're not turned on by people who want to kill you? That's a weight of my chest." Stefan commented drily.

Damon shrugged.

"Wait… Why would you suggest I sleep with her if you think she wants to kill us?" Stefan asked as they walked into the admissions office.

"Please, little brother, you can totally handle her." Damon said with a not so encouraging pat on the back.

"You must be the Salvatores. Welcome to Mystic High. I'm James." A young man sitting at the reception desk said.

"That's us." Stefan answered, pulling their papers out of his bag.

"Alright, everything seems to be in order." James said after a few minutes. "Here's your class schedules, your locker numbers and combinations, rules, and a map of the school. You can pick up your books during lunch hour. Ordinarily I'd have you pick them up before class, but you were late, so we'll have to make do."

Stefan winced slightly.

"Right. We'll be on our way." Damon answered, dragging Stefan out of the office.

"Why are our lockers so far apart?" Stefan asked, scanning their paperwork.

"I prayed extra hard this morning." Damon explained, grabbing his papers.

"Apparently not hard enough since we have two classes together." Stefan pointed out.

"If its math and history I did." Damon answered, looking back and forth between their papers.

"Nope. Homeroom and psychology. Looks like God doesn't listen to your prayers after all. Shocker." Stefan said sarcastically.

Damon shrugged before walking towards homeroom. Stefan frowned and looked at the map again. Why was he going to his locker? They didn't have books, so there wasn't anything to put in them.

Shrugging, he walked the other way, towards their first class. When he walked in, his eyes immediately went to the blonde girl from this morning sitting in the back. He smiled apologetically at her, but she glared back with the fury of a thousand suns. Stefan winced and sat down in the front row, as far from her as he could get. This was already shaping up to be an awkward year.

"Stefan Salvatore?" The teacher asked, Mr. Saltzman if Stefan remembered his schedule correctly.

"Yes?"

"Just wanted to put a face to the name. It's a small town, so I know everyone else here. I'm Mr. Saltzman. Do you know where your brother is?"

"No idea."

"Well he still has time. Class doesn't start for another five minutes. Has anyone been assigned to show you around?"

"Uh… No, but that's fine. I wouldn't want to inconvenience anyone."

"Don't worry about it. Our welcoming committee hasn't had any work for two years now. I'm sure they'll be glad for a chance to show someone around. We actually have a member in this class. Caroline?" Mr. Saltzman called.

Stefan turned and too his horror watched as the blonde glanced up from her conversation with her friend and answered.

"Yes, Mr. Saltzman?"

"I know you're on the welcoming committee. Would you mind showing Stefan around school today?"

Caroline froze, her eyes wide with a deer in the headlights expression.

"Mr. Saltzman, that's really not necessary. The front desk gave me a map. I'm sure I'll be fine." Stefan objected quickly.

"Nonsense. I'm sure Caroline doesn't mind, right?"

"Well…" Caroline started before Mr. Saltzman talked over her.

"Great. It's settled. Now, let's get started."

Mr. Saltzman walked back to his desk and picked up a paper.

"It looks like the only person missing is your brother. Perhaps I should have Caroline show him around instead, since he seems to be having so much trouble."

Stefan felt hope swell in his chest before Mr. Saltzman continued.

"On the other hand, why should you suffer for his lack of responsibility?"

Stefan sighed, sitting back in his chair, hopes of avoiding his impending doom crushed. Today was going to be awful.


End file.
